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You can’t do this. You’re not good enough. You don’t have any experience. You didn’t go to school for this. Who is going to hire you? Who is going to buy your products? There are already a million people out there who are doing what you are doing and doing it way better than you can. You should just quit.
Sound familiar?
That’s the nasty little voice of imposter syndrome. And she’s a real B! She can knock you down faster than anything else. She can stop you dead in your tracks. She can literally be the one who puts the brakes on following your dream.
But she doesn’t have to win! There are steps you can take to beat that voice, push through the fear and still achieve your goals!
Commonly described as a feeling of phoniness, in which people doubt their abilities, despite having evidence that they are actually skilled or knowledgeable in the subject/industry. When people are battling imposter syndrome they tend to dismiss their wins as “luck” or “good timing” or some other external force – or they could have the inability to recognize or accept that they’ve even won at all!
When I first decided I wanted to start a business I listened to that voice for way too long. I’m telling you, years. I was working in a job that I was falling out of love with, I had two little boys at home that I desperately wanted to be there for and I knew that the only way to own my own time and be there for them the way I envisioned was by starting my own business and building something that I could grow and scale around my family.
The first time I decided I wanted to leave my job and pursue entrepreneurship I decided I could be a Virtual Assistant and offer services to other entrepreneurs or small business owners who needed an extra set of hands, virtually. I spent days and days, months even, researching how to be the best VA I could.
At that point in my career, I had been a high-level executive manager overseeing the day to day operations of a small business that I had grown from earning 6 figures in revenue per year to 7 figures just by implementing new systems and strategy. I had been doing that for over 10 years. You guys, I had the skills. I knew what I was doing. But I was so afraid of failing because the imposter syndrome voice in my head told me I couldn’t do it so often, that eventually I believed her and went back to work for someone else before I even gave myself a try.
At the time, I had no idea what imposter syndrome was or that it was even a real thing. I felt afraid and imposter syndrome thrived off my fear like a hungry tiger.
It wasn’t until 3 years later that I decided to give entrepreneurship a try once again. I had come up with the idea to launch All Girl Shave Club and I was over the moon excited about it! Again, I spent months and months researching and planning and mapping out my business and once again, about 3 months in, the fear started budding and eventually back came my lovely little friend imposter syndrome. And this time, she was back with a VENGEANCE.
I was so paralyzed by fear that I felt the familiar cycle of wanting to quit at every turn. Thankfully I had really been working on myself over the 3 years that had passed between my last go round which gave me a little bit more strength to persevere. In addition, I had a husband who believed in me (sometimes even more than I believed in myself!) who sent me to a live event in Nashville, TN called Business Boutique. It was at Business Boutique that I was able to identify imposter syndrome and recognize that it was exactly what I had been battling with! It had a name and it wasn’t ME, it was something I actually had control over!
I also learned at Business Boutique how to push past those feelings of fear. It was a total lightbulb moment realizing that fear doesn’t mean you are doing something WRONG. It’s simply our body’s natural reaction to the unknown.
I learned to take my courage by its hand and do it anyway….to do it scared. And guess what? It has made all of the difference.
So, what can you do when you are battling the beast of imposter syndrome? Here are a few things that have helped me, that I hope will help you too.
Recognize it. Understand that fear is NORMAL. It does NOT mean you are on the wrong path. It does not mean you should not be doing what you are doing. It simply means you are stepping outside of your comfortable little bubble and trying something totally unfamiliar. That’s brave! And remember, on the opposite side of fear could be the very best experience of your life. You just have to push through it.
Don’t go at it alone. If you’re having one of those days where you feel so inadequate, so doubtful that what you are doing is even worth it – or that you really have what it takes to do the things you are trying to do – call up a trusted friend, colleague or mentor. Don’t hide in shame. Allow them to point out all of your talents and skills. Allow them to show you how far you’ve come. This might be one of the hardest things for you to do because those of us who get imposter syndrome are often too embarrassed to share it with others because we feel like a fraud. Go back to suggestion number 1 in this case and push through it.
Love yourself. Keep a running list of all of the experience, skill and reasons why you ARE good enough to be doing what you’re doing and refer to that when you’re having a rough day. I like to use Trello to keep myself organized and I have a list called “love notes.” It’s where I keep all the positive reminders that I have given myself or that others have given to me to refer to when I need a boost out of a funk. It really helps because it’s concrete proof that I DO have what it takes to do my thing and I have all those reasons staring right at me reminding me.
Get to work. You have to jump in. Whatever that looks like – just get started. Sitting around paralyzed by fear and imposter syndrome won’t help you to reach your goals any faster and it certainly won’t take it away. When you do the work you quell that voice because you are proving that you DO have what it takes because you are doing it! Sit down and write that blog post. Make that phone call. Send that email. Design that website. Whatever work you have to do, roll up your sleeves and get started. When you get lost in your work, you’ll be too focused to feel the effects of fear and imposter syndrome and you’ll be one step closer to reaching your goals!
Look how far you’ve come. Even though my business is what many would consider a successful business, I STILL get affected by imposter syndrome and fear. It never completely goes away but it does help to take a moment to logically look at how far you’ve come since day 1. Even if you are on day 2 of your business, you’ve likely achieved something or completed something – and that’s worth noting! For me, I like to jump on the fulfillment line. I like to help pack boxes and fulfill orders. It reminds me of how far I’ve come and how proud I am of the work that I’ve done. I hold and pack each product with immense gratitude and love and I hope that my customers feel that when they receive their orders.
Serve someone else. Yep, you read that right. You may be thinking “whyyyy in the world would you want me to help someone else when I can’t even help myself?” And that’s precisely why I suggest it. When you lose yourself in service, you gain so much more in return – including clarity of exactly who you are. And who you are is not a fraud. You are not a talentless, skill-less nobody. You have gifts and you have purpose. And through service, you’ll be more likely to see and feel that.
Kill the compare bear. Just because she’s winning in her business doesn’t mean that you can’t too. Comparing yourself to others will never, ever serve you. Just stop doing it.
Journal. Write it all out. Don’t hold back. Write whatever it is you are thinking and feeling about yourself and ask yourself why. Getting this all out, instead of internalizing it for days, will help you to see things in a more realistic way. It’s kind of like when we were teenagers and we’d burn pictures and love notes from our old boyfriends. Remember? It just feels good to get it out! And you’ll recognize how silly imposter syndrome really is.
So the next time you feel that fear creeping in or you hear that nagging voice of imposter syndrome telling you you’re not good enough – take charge. Follow some of the strategies listed here and see which ones work best for you. Do you have any other solutions for battling imposter syndrome? List them below!
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